More B+P Kit Juju
Posted on October 27, 2007 by Richard
By: Richard
I was keen to see what my next ride held in store for the new B&P Team kit and I was not disappointed. I was so busy last week that between the storms and working I was not able to ride much. Sunday morning I rode on the Freewheeling Ride, a group of crabby old men, mean age 50+, riding in the Violent Clown colors. The Freewheeling Ride generally has about 15-20 cyclists. In the Spring there might be a few “newbies” and women with varying cycling experience. These Spring rides can be painfully slow as the ride leader- control freak-
crabby old man-Dave Henderson, tries to control the speed to make sure not everyone gets dropped, left behind, and humiliated.
By the end of Summer, in the deep August heat, the ride has boiled down to a reduction of crabby old men. The upside of this is that everyone is fit and the speed goes.
I had two genuine compliments on the B&P team kit and many insults. Insults like the “shorts made my butt look big.” One has to realize that this is not a bad thing. I have many unfortunate physical features but a big butt is not one of them. Today’s American male uses degrading insults as a way to compliment one another. For example, Andrew calls me “fool”. It took me about a year to realize it was a reverse compliment. That calling me a fool meant he liked me. Go figure? The kit was largely well received with many insults.
“Coffee, ride, beer, repeat” was especially popular. Someone pointed out that you can see the washing label through the sheer gray spandex. I explained that inserting the washing label in one’s butt crack provided extra stability. The shorts are great with one caveat. They made cycling shorts in black for 85 years for a good reason. Running my hand over my tire to knock some glass bits off, I instinctively wipe my hand next on my… shorts. Add a flat tire to that and the gray gets pretty skanky by the end of the ride.
I thought the B&P Team kit “effect” on the opposite sex was a first ride phenomena until I was on Dean Keeton near my house at the Red River light when I heard this jittery, Japanese, honking behind me. I turned around and a couple of cars back there were what looked to be two UT co-eds in a silver Accord. I didn’t know them but they kept honking and I turned around again and they had rolled their windows down and were waving frantically… at me. They were giggling hysterically as they drove by. What’s up with that?
Richard
High top socks are lame. Only Yates and Eckert can somehow look normal in them.
Leave a Comment
If you would like to make a comment, please fill out the form below.
You must be logged in to post a comment.